Hi Steve, We all have things we need to forgive....and for which we should receive forgiveness. This has always been difficult for me, too, but extremely liberating.......
 

Your parents harmed you. It is not a matter of forgive, or beef for that matter. Your parents dynamic, their cruel, obsessive, insane, queer perversity on both sides... harmed you. Killed you. It happened in Dedham. The child within died. Do you remember flipping out so young? I do. The child within went insane. Your behavior became super hyper, your hands shook. The child died before he was five. Don't you remember the incident? The Lost Boy then came. The Lost Boy remained many years. He was sent to Groton, where it was colder then his mothers cold, cruel, dry womb of daggers. Ruined chances, whether creative or not were then made by you of barf, ugliness, hatred, garbage, ugly coffee mugs, fecal droppings,camel cigs,excrements for joy. A killed child within spends his life showing parents how horribly ugly his world is. First by visits, etiquette, little visits the pretend care for the alzhimer victim. Dumping and saving became the same. You did get to breathe...regardless. You got hell out of life and for a life. You did get to spread their sin. Sin meaning 'ignorance' and you did not get to outgrow it. You are stuck. You can "become" momentarily, if it is for heaven's sake. You required heaven, angels, women who were pure love and with whom you could not drive insane. What you could not move, lost boy, because solid and suddenly, the illusions of what is, instead of your creative death, began.
Nothing to forgive there. Just to get away from. Still, you spilled your bad toxic wasteful anger on others always. Always. What's next? It is pretty funny how you want an image all of a sudden. Do you look good?